|What can we say to someone who refuses to accept a gesture of peace?|
وَإِن جَنَحُواْ لِلسَّلْمِ فَاجْنَحْ لَهَا وَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللّهِ إِنَّهُ هُوَ السَّمِيعُ الْعَلِيمُ (سورۃ الانفال, آية 61)
But if the enemy incline towards peace, do thou (also) incline towards peace, and trust in Allah: for He is the One that Heareth and Knoweth (all things). (Surah 8, Verse 61)
One day Naim yelled at his wife, Fatma and cursed her. Then, as the neighbors watched, he threw her out of the house with her belongings and ordered her not to return. Fatma telephoned her father who came and took her to his house.
After several days Naim began to feel lonely. He could not manage the household and children without her and so he went to Fatma's father and asked him to send her back. Her father threw him out and said: "Never come back. I want you to give my daughter a divorce. I have always treated Fatma with respect. She was my most pampered child and now you have insulted her in front of the neighbors."
Naim appealed to several of the village notables and asked them to help him bring Fatma home. He promised never to act like that again. The notables approached the father and asked him to agree to send Fatma home if only for the sake of her children. Her father refused. The mukhtar said to Fatma's father: " If Naim has regretted his actions and wants to make peace with your daughter, give him that opportunity and let Allah's will be done. You certainly are familiar with Surah 8, Verse 61, which says: "But if the enemy incline towards peace, do thou (also) incline towards peace, and trust in Allah."
Explanation: everyone knows that making peace entails risks. Who can guarantee that the other party's intentions are sincere? Who can guarantee that Naim will not repeat his conduct? He may have promised a number of times in the past to treat his wife with respect but failed to keep his word. However, the Quran tells us that if we err, it is better to incline towards conciliation and peace and not war. Since all peace-making entails risk, we must place our trust in Allah so that if we are led astray, He will help us. The Quran does not recommend that we behave foolishly and close our eyes to the facts. But in those cases where an individual gains the impression that the other party may be inclined towards a peaceful solution, it is not worth missing the opportunity. However, if Naim again behaves badly and again asks for forgiveness, Fatma and her father should not fall into the trap and delude themselves, as do many abused women, who return to their husbands again and again, sometimes until they meet a bitter end.