Home Quranet Chapter 8 What can we say to someone who is ashamed to accept psychological therapy?
What can we say to someone who is ashamed to accept psychological therapy?
Chapter 8

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواْ كُونُواْ قَوَّامِينَ بِالْقِسْطِ شُهَدَاء لِلّهِ وَلَوْ عَلَى أَنفُسِكُمْ أَوِ الْوَالِدَيْنِ وَالأَقْرَبِينَ إِن يَكُنْ غَنِيّاً أَوْ فَقَيراً فَاللّهُ أَوْلَى بِهِمَا فَلاَ تَتَّبِعُواْ الْهَوَى أَن تَعْدِلُواْ وَإِن تَلْوُواْ أَوْ تُعْرِضُواْ فَإِنَّ اللّهَ كَانَ بِمَا تَعْمَلُونَ خَبِيراً (سورۃ النساء, آية 135)

O ye who believe! stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin, and whether it be (against) rich or poor: for Allah can best protect both. Follow not the lusts (of your hearts), lest ye swerve, and if ye distort (justice) or decline to do justice, verily Allah is well- acquainted with all that ye do. (Surah 4, Verse 135)

Salem's wife made an appointment with a marriage counselor and asked him to help her solve her marital problems because of her tense relationship with her husband. If the situation continued, she said, there could be serious repercussions. She told him about problems connected to the children and to her as well as serious problems outside the home. The counselor listened and then asked her to come to a therapeutic session with her husband. He recommended that they attend several sessions of therapy as a couple. He also explained that it was often worth solving problems between a husband and wife within the framework of family therapy and not individual therapy.

Salem's wife asked her husband to come but he refused. "That's all I need", he said and added, "I want you to know that what you are doing is wrong and unacceptable". He accused her of involving outsiders in their relationship. When the counselor heard this he told Salem's wife to quote Verse 135 of Surah 4 to him: "O ye who believe! stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to Allah, even as against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin". "This verse enables us to accept responsibility and to criticize ourselves or our relatives", the counselor explained to her. "We should not despair", he added. "We must persist and pressure your husband in various directions until he agrees to come for therapy and improves the atmosphere at home".

Explanation: it is no disgrace to accept counseling or therapeutic help from a professional (psychologist, educational counselor, social worker etc). We all have problems of different types and the ability to admit to difficulties and be willing to treat them generally attests to emotional maturity. Denial of difficulties often attests to weakness. As in the case of physical disease, various emotional problems require

treatment and should not be neglected. But people are frequently ashamed to ask for emotional aid. They say: "I'm not crazy. Why should I need psychological treatment?" However, the reverse is usually true. People who ask for psychological help are often healthier than those who are afraid to seek aid. Thus, the act of approaching a mental health counselor can attest to maturity and emotional strength

Now begin therapy. He has equipped Salen’s wife with a Quran verse which refers to the importance of the individual’s personal responsibility l towards himself. By accepting therapy, we are bearing witness against ourselves and examining ourselves and others. We are accepting responsibility instead of considering some other person to be responsible. This verse can encourage the husband to take responsibility and enter therapy.