Home Quranet Chapter 8 What can we say to a boy or girl whose sweetheart has left?
What can we say to a boy or girl whose sweetheart has left?
Chapter 8

يَا بُنَيَّ أَقِمِ الصَّلَاةَ وَأْمُرْ بِالْمَعْرُوفِ وَانْهَ عَنِ الْمُنكَرِ وَاصْبِرْ عَلَى مَا أَصَابَكَ إِنَّ ذَلِكَ مِنْ عَزْمِ الْأُمُورِ ( سورۃ لقمان, آية 17)

"O my son! establish regular prayer, enjoin what is just, and forbid what is wrong: and bear with patient constancy whatever betide thee; for this is firmness (of purpose) in (the conduct of) affairs. (Surah 14, Verse 17)

At the last teachers' meeting, Ali's behavior was discussed. The teachers agreed that the conduct of this tenth grader had changed drastically for the worse. He rarely came to school and when he did, he was late. He didn't prepare his homework and his grades had dropped considerably. "There's something strange about his conduct", said one of the teachers. "He's up in the air and not focused". "Something must be bothering him", said another teacher. It was decided that the counselor would take action.

The next day she invited Ali's parents for a long discussion and asked them many questions. They told her that he came home very late at night and in the morning refused to stir and slept till noon. An additional check revealed that he and friends were using drugs.

The counselor summoned Ali, and he told her that his girl friend had left him and he was taking drugs in order to forget her.

"God exhorts us to keep away from all bad things, and drugs are of course among them", the counselor explained. "And if something bad happens to us, God commands us to be patient because patience is the quality which He respects most of all". She opened the Quran and read out to him: "O my son! establish regular prayer, enjoin what is just, and forbid what is wrong: and bear with patient constancy whatever betide thee; for this is firmness (of purpose) in (the conduct of) affairs". Ali understood now what God expected of him.

Explanation: adolescence is not an easy time and is marked by stormy emotions. A boy or girl whose sweetheart leave them often become depressed. In extreme cases this can lead to attempted suicide. In easier cases they may cease functioning for a time. In Ali's case, he began to use drugs in order to escape painful reality. In such situations the adolescent needs some adult figure to pacify him and provide perspective, someone who will tell them that pain will be blunted by time, that he will find a new sweetheart etc. One of the strongest commands which is reiterated often in the Quran is the need to be patient. The counselor was right to emphasize this aspect with the aid of the appropriate Quran verse. Using drugs of any kind is prohibited and is one of the disgraceful acts which the Quran forbids.